The plan is that we fast for 14 days on nothing but water, followed by one week of a re-feeding phase where we will gradually start eating while learning healthy ways, recipes, and tips. We are allowed 3 cups of herbal teas with a few drops of honey (no more than 3 teaspoons) three times a day only, advised to pace them into a breakfast, lunch, dinner drinks kind of.
The first day of the fast was both exciting and terrifying, not knowing what to expect, how will my body react, how much will I suffer, or how hungry will I be. I know I have great tolerance to not eating, after all I was anorexic for 6-12 months before where I literally would barely take a bite or
sip out of anything. I also went on a hunger strike before for several days, no food or water, I stopped the strike when I finally fainted; people cannot survive without water for more than several days. I am a strong girl, I have stamina, and I believe in myself; my voice, my girly girl attitude, and my ever so often lack of self esteem easily hide those facts from the world. I know I can do it, but I am still anxious. I might be more anxious about meeting new people and feeling like an outsider than I actually am with the idea of the fast itself, I was, and still am in a way, somehow socially phobic and painfully shy. Though everyone seems to be really nice and pleasant, and though I am getting along well with them, but I always feel the struggle and effort exerted in socializing with people I do not know well, let alone don't know at all.
The first day of the fast was both exciting and terrifying, not knowing what to expect, how will my body react, how much will I suffer, or how hungry will I be. I know I have great tolerance to not eating, after all I was anorexic for 6-12 months before where I literally would barely take a bite or
sip out of anything. I also went on a hunger strike before for several days, no food or water, I stopped the strike when I finally fainted; people cannot survive without water for more than several days. I am a strong girl, I have stamina, and I believe in myself; my voice, my girly girl attitude, and my ever so often lack of self esteem easily hide those facts from the world. I know I can do it, but I am still anxious. I might be more anxious about meeting new people and feeling like an outsider than I actually am with the idea of the fast itself, I was, and still am in a way, somehow socially phobic and painfully shy. Though everyone seems to be really nice and pleasant, and though I am getting along well with them, but I always feel the struggle and effort exerted in socializing with people I do not know well, let alone don't know at all.
The first day was fine for me, many other people suffered from headaches and needed some space and quite. I did have a "nap" from 3pm to 9 pm, and still managed to get a 7 hours of night sleep after a couple of hours, the quantity and quality of sleep was so extremely bizarre for me. I have been insomniac for a long time now, and during the summer I literally couldn't sleep for 10 whole days!
When I finally woke up at 9 pm I was faced with a tough dilemma; should I or should I not rush to get dressed and hurry to our "house" (where the whole group meets every day) before 10 pm (when they close the doors). I was too tired to rush, and felt like it would be a hassle to do that, all just for a simple cup of herbal tea. I decided to skip, only to be faced with a night long daydreaming of drinking that hot cup of herbal tea, that is all I aspired to in life at the point.
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